Purging...

So, we are in the throes of moving....

 I guess the only time I blog is when I should be doing something else, like pack up our gazillion boxes of things to be moved. This afternoon my parents took Elliotte which allowed Ben and I to spend a good chunk of time going through all of our things, it was wonderful. We filled two GIANT garbage bags of clothes to be donated and another couple bags of things to be thrown out. I'm really looking forward to seeing my new wardrobe when we get established in the new house. I LOVE getting rid of clutter not that you'd know it....but I really do. It feels so good when you get in that mood and just start tossing things in garbage bags left right and centre. It seems fitting that we should be going through this purging of our things because lately I've really been craving a purging in other areas as well. I've been feeling a draw to simpler living, essentially taking care of our bodies and our minds and getting rid of all the 'clutter' that gets in the way of getting us to the place that the Lord wants us to be.

 One of the areas that I'm realizing the importance of is physical health. I've been making an effort in the choice of foods that we eat but I have been majorly lacking in the exercise aspect. Ben has been saying for months now that after he gets home from work he would love to watch Elliotte while I go for a run. I've finally taken him up on it. I've only been running for a couple weeks now, but let me tell you, I LOVE IT. It feels so refreshing to get out in the crisp spring weather and I can't even express how amazing it is to have that half hour to myself to work with my body and do something hard, I'm hooked. 

Another area I've felt a draw to purge is our media consumption. After a long day a lot of the time Ben and I like to relax on the couch and watch something mindless on Netflix.  For a lot of my teenage years we didn't have a TV and I've always said that my kids won't watch any TV, so the fact that we watch it so much is starting to get me pretty disheartened. I'm sure if we don't make a change soon, then when Elliotte gets to the age where TV can distract her I will readily go to it as a babysitter. We haven't taken any steps in the media purging direction yet, soon I hope.

Anyways there are a few of my thoughts, I know they're quite scattered and possibly don't make much sense but I have to get back to packing so there you have it. I'm sure next time I check in we will be in our new home!   

Here is Elliotte camped out in what will be our new kitchen...

Profound, I know.

So everything I have to say today is going to come out sounding like a cliché but even though you hear things over and over, when they pertain to you somehow it seems so profound, ya know? Tonight as Ellie was in her bath I was struck by how amazing life is (profound, I know). From the moment we are conceived we begin to change. The first while it's mostly development as far as size and growing organs etc, etc, then once we are born we begin to learn the 'ways of life' mighty quickly, we continue to grow in size but all of a sudden we are becoming smart.... For instance, for the past couple weeks Elliotte has been able to sit on her own in the bath and consequentially has discovered splashing. The incredible pride I feel when I watch her entire face light up as her brain makes the connection between the cause and effect of hitting the water with her hands is kind of ridiculous... I am blown away at the amazing learning curve of a 5 1/2 month old. Every day she seems to find something else in this world that she wants to learn and she does it. Lately I've been watching as she scooches backwards, or how she will stand FOREVER, giggling and squealing while she holds on to the coffee table, or how she likes to grab the dogs tail and stick it in her mouth... Her eyes are always so interested in the world around her and I love to watch as I see understanding hit her face. I guess what I'm trying to say is that I can't believe how amazing it is that something can start out as an egg and a sperm and somehow becomes a person, a completely unique, beautiful, lovely person (profound, I know!).

5 Month Update

Elliotte's Size:

My little girl was weighed this morning and was a whopping 13 pounds 1.5 ounces... We have visited  a lactation consultant because I was concerned that Elliotte has not been gaining enough weight and I feel so much better now. I have been really concerned about her getting enough milk and it was nice to have been given some tools to help increase my supply. The lactation consultant told me that since Elliotte is happy, wets enough diapers and is super active I should not supplement with formula, or begin solids and not to go on any drugs to increase my supply (for now), but instead to take the next two weeks to try to work on my supply and only then if her weight is still not increasing enough to visit a doctor. I was worried that I would be told to instantly go out and buy formula and give up breastfeeding altogether, it was such a relief to see a professional who was not overly concerned. I suppose in two weeks if she has not gained we will be forced to take some action.

Developments:

This child is sitting like a boss! She is perfectly stable now and loves to sit and look at the world around her. She also has taken more of an interest in toys and likes to grab and shake and stick everything in her mouth.

She has started somewhat crawling backwards and I don't think it will be too long before she's a crawling machine. It's cute, if I put her on her tummy and stick a toy in front of her she will try SOO hard to get to it and usually ends up scooting herself backwards. 

I now know why Ellie has been drooling a ridiculous amount and can't keep things out of her mouth for a second....TEETH! Sure enough Elliotte has two teeth ready to pop out the front bottom of her mouth. You can see them and all that stands between the fresh air and those two pearly whites is a thin layer of skin.

Tidbits:

• Sleeping has been 100% better. Elliotte is slowly transitioning to a 7:00PM bedtime and will usually only get up 3 or so times to eat before getting up for the day at 7:00AM and luckily at least one those times is while I'm still awake. I could totally get used to only getting up 2-3 times a night. 
• Ellie has this incredibly high-pitched screech that she likes to use to show us that she's happy, I'm convinced it's the cutest thing in the entire universe. 
• Pretty much all of Elliotte's hair fell when she was a month old or so and it's finally starting to grow back.
• Elliotte eye colour keeps changing but I think she's going to end up with hazel eyes, time will tell.
• I have been teaching Elliotte some signs and I'm almost certain that she now can sign 'milk' to me!

I'm so amazed at my girl, she blows me away with all the ways in which she is developing and all on her own volition! I can't wait for what's next.

Got my hair done this week, it was LONG overdue. My babysitting situation fell through so I got to bring Elliotte with me. 

Picture taken on her 5 month birthday.

Sleeping beauty

My regal beauty of the pug variety!

4 Month Update....

Our girl is now over 4 months old and it's incredible how much she has changed since her arrival. I enjoy my days with her so much, I truly couldn't have known that motherhood would be so totally amazing!

Elliotte's Size:

My girl is still pretty little. At her appointment this week she weighed 12 pounds 6 ounces which puts her in the 15th percentile, such a little girl. The pediatrician has been watching her weight gain because it has been so slow but as of this week she said she has no concerns about her. She's happy, and growing (although not quickly), ACTIVE, and demanding. The doc mentioned that since she is so active she is most likely just not able to keep weight on, I wish I had the same problem...

Everything was put into perspective this week when we visited 2 brand new babies, fresh out of the  NICU (both premies), they are SO LITTLE, which makes Elliotte look HUGE!

Developments:

Well this girl just does not stay still! On Friday November 23rd, Elliotte rolled from belly to back. I thought it was strange how long it took her considering she rolled the other way at 2 months. Now tummy time is basically a joke since she INSTANTLY rolls over the second I place her on her stomach.

We got Elliotte a Jolly Jumper and she LOVES it. She loves to just hop around and usually lasts about 15 minutes before she loses interest. It has allowed me to be able to actually get some things done around the house.

This girl is always wanting to know what's going on in the world. Ever since she was about a month old she has wanted to be held facing outward. She is always looking around staring at everyone and everything. Ben gets frustrated because she really won't snuggle anymore. The only time she lets you hold her close it to nurse and even then she's flailing her arms and legs about. I'm downright petrified for how she's going to be once she starts walking.....

Ellie is almost sitting. She will sit for about 10-15 seconds before she wavers and topples over. I don't think it will be too many months before she is a good little sitter. 

Well, I have now kissed any good night rest goodbye...Ellie seems to have regressed. She wakes up every 1.5 hours and will just cry, sometimes I'll feed her to sleep and then the second I place her in the bassinet she starts to wail. Last night I ended up just sleeping in the bed in her room with her next to me since I could not get her to sleep on her own. I'm very perplexed as to whats going on. She went from 9 hour stretches to this. Does anyone have any advice or ideas as to what I can do? I'm starting to feel like a zombie, not to mention a bad mother....

In more fun news...Elliotte has now discovered Rose the Pug. She will look at her and just laugh as Rose runs circles around her. Now that she's reaching for things if Rose is within reaching distance Elliotte just grabs for whatever she can grasp. Luckily, Rose the Pug is easy going and doesn't get angry when she has her eyeballs fondled. 

Interesting Tidbits:

• We went to 'Movies for Mommy' at the theatre last week, which is nice in the sense that we got out, but once there I realized that it isn't for us. First of all the movie that was showing was pretty violent which doesn't make sense to me seeing as there are kids there... and secondly, Elliotte wanted to stand, squirm, laugh, squeal and bounce all over the place for the entirety of the movie... yes, I was 'that mom', you know, the one that can't control her baby. 
• Now that Ellie isn't sleeping so much at night she seems to be having better naps and I'm loving having a little more time to get things done. I've noticed that she doesn't nap if we are out and about so I have been trying to stay home more during the days and it is LOVELY. (I also like the idea of staying out of the Christmas hustle and bustle, it is a well known fact that I don't like Christmas, maybe I'll go into why in a later post) 
• We are hosting 2 parties this weekend and my house is a DISASTER, hopefully Ellie will sleep for me today so that I can get ready.
• Ellie is at an awkward stage where she is too long for a lot of her 0-3 month clothes but is wayyy to skinny to fit into her 3-6 month stuff. Her clothes either look nice and fitted with her limbs just too long, or they fit in length and she is swallowed by the width of them. 

I know it's soooo cliche but I just can't believe how fast time is going! My girl is most definitely out of the newborn stage and literally bouncing into babyhood. Next stop, toddlerhood! I just want my days to slow down and my baby to stay the same for just a WEEK... The good news is that with every phase comes amazing growth and development- there is ALWAYS something fun and new. 

She has found her feet and it's impossible to keep them out of her mouth.

Chillin' out in her Jolly Jumper

Found a rare moment of her happy on her tummy

Carseat smiles!

This is her 'I'm ready for a nap' face.

Of course we need a picture of Rose the Pug!

And we can't forget the people who are usually behind the camera. My parents took Ellie while Ben and I made a quick dash to Costco the other night, it's  funny how even just grocery shopping can feel like a date now.

2 Month Update... 2 weeks late.

Elliotte is now over 2 months old. I can't believe it! She is such a precious little girl. Every day she is changing and growing and I feel so blessed to be able to be here for every little development.

Elliotte's Size:
Well, my little girl is still pretty little. We had an appointment with the pediatrician last week and Ellie weighed in at 10 lbs, 7oz.  Her length was 22 1/2 inches which was actually shorter than she was a few weeks prior at her final midwife appointment so I'm assuming someone measured her wrong. The pediatrician had no concerns about her size so I'm just going to enjoy her skinny little legs while I can.
However, the original reason we went to the pediatrician was due to the fact that Ellie has a dark red area on the bottom corner of her lip. I had no concerns about it, but after having my Uncle (a pediatrician) take a look at her we decided to get it checked out. She may need treatment for it but at this stage we're just waiting to get in to see a dermatologist before deciding anything.

Developments:
On Monday, October 8th Elliotte rolled over. We were at my cousins house enjoying Thanksgiving dinner with the extended family, Ellie and her second cousin were lying on the floor playing. All of a sudden Ellie just flipped right over from her back to her stomach. I assumed it was just a fluke since she's still so young but since then she's been doing it with increasing frequency. She's already done it 4 times today. It's quite exciting to watch her, she can get about 3/4 over no problem and then she get's stuck on her arm, she grunts with frustration for about 5 minutes before she works up the strength to get completely over. I think I have a tenacious little girl on my hands. She still shows no signs of wanting to roll from stomach to back.

She's now cooing and laughing up a storm. It's so fun to play with her now that she likes to interact more and more. She likes to imitate the sounds and faces that we make. It's a hoot.

A List of interesting tidbits:

• We have been trying to get out lots to avoid cabin fever.
• Sometimes when Ellie is having a particularly long nap I put my finger under her nose to make sure she's still breathing.
• While we are on the topic of sleeping, we are actually getting a reasonable amount of it these days.
• Elliotte seems to have decided that she won't take a bottle any more...rats...
• I cried when Moose rolled over. I'm quite the suck...
• It feels like fall is already over and winter is here, boo.
• Ben and I had a fantastic date night sans baby this past week. 
• There is nothing more precious then my little girls coo's, smiles and giggles.
• This parenting thing is harder than I ever imagined, but I wouldn't trade it for the world! 

Sometimes...

Sometimes I feel like the worst mother in the world. I feel like no matter how much research I do, I still make the wrong decision. I question everything I do, do I hold her enough, does she get enough tummy time, is she lying on her back to much, is she in her car seat for too many hours a day, am I changing her diaper often enough, am I too uptight, am I too laid back....blah...blah...blah. It's all a bunch of useless gibberish. I know in my head that all of this worrying is a waste of time and I know that no one is perfect, it's just that I feel like I'm working on the most important assignment that I will ever do and I really want to do well. How's that for vulnerability. 

7 Weeks

Boy am I glad to leave the last week behind. If Ellie wasn't eating, she was crying, luckily this phase only lasted 48 hours. In retrospect I think it's pretty obvious that is was a growth spurt, but boy was that a long 2 days. I now have a lot of sympathy for parents who deal with colicky babies. 

I feel as if we are sliding into a bit of a routine now, although it's definitely not one that I would have designed had I been in charge. Elliotte for the last 4 days has been very alert and awake from about 5:30PM to 1:00AM only sleeping for about 15 minute intervals every 3 hours or so. During this time she likes to eat every 1/2 hour. From 1:00AM to 6:30AM she sleeps like a baby (woohoo!). From 6:30AM to 5:30PM she follows the pattern of eating, then is awake and playful for maybe 1/2 hour then back to sleeps for 3 hours then repeat. This seems to be pretty consistent and to be honest I don't hate it. This pattern allows me to get a lot done during the day and I'm sort of getting used to staying awake till 1:00AM. I'd say the only downside is that when Ben get's home we don't get much time to relax together since this is the time when Ellie is the highest maintenance. Ideally I'd like it if she went down for the night at 8:00ish and then I would just get up and feed her a couple times during the night, but at this stage she calls the shots.

Update Time:

Elliotte's Size:

I feel sort of lost since little E didn't have an appointment this week. I know she's growing though because she is now fitting a few of her 0-3 month onesies and even a couple of the 3 month sleepers. She isn't really filling any of her clothes out widthwise but lengthwise she sure is. I'm excited to see her weight and length in a couple weeks when she'll be 2 months old. 

Post-Pregnancy Me:

Well I'm ashamed to say that I didn't make it to the gym at all this week. My excuse every day was the same, I didn't have any milk pumped and I wouldn't leave her with my mom without an emergency bottle. So, Monday morning first thing I did was pump a bottle, so now I have no excuse and yet I haven't made it....curious. We have gone every day for at least an hour long walk with Ellie in her sling which has been awesome. I especially like going for walks now because of the beautiful fall weather. Next week I'm definitely getting my membership though! 

Life Happenings:

Our evenings have been pretty laid back due to the fact that Elliotte is essentially attached to my body but we have managed to get out a bit. I pumped a bottle for her on her 6 week birthday so Ben and I managed to go on our first date sans baby. The date only lasted about 1 1/2 hours because she drank her bottle and was immediately hungry again, but it was just good to leave her and know that she was safe. I was surprised how safe I felt leaving her with my parents. I was also shocked at how much I missed the little one after only about an hour.

 In the evenings we like to go for walks, mostly because being in the Maya wrap is basically the only way that Ellie will sleep. I have loved having my Maya wrap, I'm not a big fan of strollers, I hate the idea of her being strapped down for so much time, and I love having her so close to my body when she's in the wrap, i can even nurse her while she's in there! I love looking down at her beautiful face and lightly patting her little bum as she gently sways back and forth along with my steps.

Ellie and I have continued to frequent the breastfeeding cafe here in the city and it's something that I look forward to each week. This week we talked about parenting, in specific, things that our parents did that we do and do not appreciate. It was good to actually think about things that that we would like to take from our parents parenting styles and things that we can learn from and do differently.

Weekly Highlight:
Honestly my highlight was probably waking up Saturday morning to a baby who was NOT crying and who appeared to have snapped out of her consistent crying. I was SOO worried that she had developed colic and to see that pass in only a couple days was such a relief. Getting my little girl to smile is probably my daily highlight. It's neat how the little things give me so much joy these days.

She melts my heart...

Little girl, big bed.